The room is on fire, invisible smoke

‘The room is on fire

Invisible smoke’

In just 7 words Taylor Swift has so beautifully and tragically summed up what anxiety feels like for me.

Anxiety is complex and I’ve spent so long trying to put into words what it feels like.

Having anxiety is like being trapped in the rubble of a demolished building. It’s you fighting so hard to clear away the stones and mess around you but no matter how hard you try there always seems to be more left. Some days I let myself suffocate in the rubble because I’m too tired of fighting and I’m too tired of feeling like I never close to the light whereas other days I swear I can see just a glimpse of light and that thought can help motivate me to carry on. The struggle is, the rubble isn’t real and it’s hard to escape from something that’s not really there.

The panic of a room being on fire is so real with anxiety because you always feel like something is really wrong but then when other people look around they see nothing and that’s why it’s so hard to explain what’s going on in your head because no one else can see it.

Just hearing these words just reminds me that although it’s not exactly the same, maybe other people get what I’m going through and maybe other people understand the pain of being scared of something that isn’t truly there and when I hear these lyrics I feel less alone and that’s all I’ve ever wanted and the light I need on those days where I’m consumed in my own thoughts.

– rachel


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